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truebeamer

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(no subject) [Mar. 22nd, 2008|10:50 am]
truebeamer

 It's going on 5 months now that we are not together and I still think about you every single day. you talk to me once in a while but it sucks not being your friend anymore, we say we are, but you don't want to talk to me, or see me.  I Love you, and no this isn't creepy writing this up here because you are the only one that would read it  anyway. I have no other way to vent about how i still feel about you.  I have changed since we were together and i wish you could see it. I don't mean changed for you, but just changed as we all do with time. I need a second chance. 

I have been meeting many new people, going to parties and bars, working towards a career. i've been with other girls, but I hate it, I honestly think about you every single day. and I don't even know if it's a bad thing anymore. am I a nut to not be able to move on? am I anoying you? or am I that in love that i think i should wait cause you might really love me again. I know we had a rough time at the end of our relationship, I know it isn't easy being so far away. but give me the chance and I swear on my life and all that is god in the world that I can make it work but have to want to help me. 

I miss you so much. you ask me why i think you are so perfect. you are for me. your conversation, personality, your humor, your freckels. the way I feel when i'm with you. I miss you. I Love you. I'm sorry

Maybe you just arn't the same person at all anymore. Maybe i'm not. Maybe this is over, and i do need to move on, I hope not

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(no subject) [May. 6th, 2005|11:43 pm]
truebeamer
[mood |gratefulgrateful]

Hell YES!! First place baby! the talent show was tonight and aparently we were effing amazing. I really didn't think that we were going to win because there we some good bands playing, but everyone loved us, when the curtin opened and we started to play electric everyone in the audiance cheered. we got $100 so thats awsome but we all have to split it so it's not gonna be anything, but still it was alot of fun so that doesn't matter much. I'm also not feeling all that well latley, I gave blood this week but aparently i'm not as big of a man as i thought i was cause i fainted. It was so strange cuse i never felt sick till i woke up, i closed my eyes and the next thing i know i was being shaken and people were checking my vitals, but i'm good now, just real weak. well one week until prom, i'm getting stoaked now i think it's gonna be awsome, well I am going with the greatest girl in the whole world! well thats all for now.
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(no subject) [Apr. 28th, 2005|12:01 am]
truebeamer
[mood |frustratedfrustrated]
[music |slayer]

Ok, so this weekend is the stringendo concert! you all Must go!! it should be real good, well vivace will be at least, but our orchestra isn't bad either. so these two english research papers suck, it wouldn't be so bad if i only had to do one, but no, i fucked up, so now i have to do two! yay! two weeks left till spack. prom, should be good. it's kinda funny how all the people that kept saying they don't care suddenly only think about it, well i guesse it is kinda a real big thing but still thats kinda cool. also you should all go to the talent show at spack, the date was changed to may 6th so all go, our band probably won't win, cause theres an effin great band playing, oh well it will still be fun. Also, I officialy decided i have no fucking clue what to do with my life after highschool. seriously , for the first time i'm starting to think about life after high school, and i'm a bit scared about it, well first i have to graduate witch may be difficult, but i think i'll manage to do that part on time, so if anyone thinks they know what i would be good at in life, let me know, thanks. well here comes the weekend, sweet! (hey carlos catch me if you can) ok later all!!
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(no subject) [Apr. 23rd, 2005|12:29 am]
truebeamer
[mood |happyhappy]

So alot happened since i wrote last, Grease was last weekend, and we actualy pulled it off, I truly didn't think it would look decent, but alot of work from mrs. ciancio and her amazing father mr. scarone made this play look pretty damn good. Friday night of the show was kyra's birthday (also happend to be one month)and she came to the show so that was cool. I'm pretty sure my parents love her, cause they let me hang out with her on school nights (never happens with my madre), and so kyra and I went out after the sunday show, I lose cause i want to kyra, but i could win! I think theres like three weeks till the prom, I'm pretty excited i think it will be fun, I just wish people would pay me the effing money for the limo cause i'm gonna get screwed over real soon if i don't get the money. Our electric fiddle band plays at spack next friday so everyone go see us it should be good. Also a couple of weeks ago i went to carnegie hall to see yo yo ma and his ensamble play their silk road album, it was good, and even better cause kyra came with me. well i'm officialy tired, later!
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(no subject) [Apr. 6th, 2005|11:21 pm]
truebeamer
[mood |contentcontent]

Havn't wronte anything in a while, ah not to much going on though, I went over the weekend to go see the John Jay musical Les Mis. it was really good (Kyra you did great). after the play i talked to kyras dad and he started talking to me about my eagle prject, think that freaked kyra out a little, but hes cool. Greese feels really scary right now, i don't think we're ready for this show in less than two weeks, but i think we'll pull it off, I just hope it doesn't look that bad.
I'm kinda excited about this prom now, Mostly because i'm going with Kyra, but i know people that are going now so this should be cool, i havn't seen kyra all week, so that sucks but hopefully soon, I miss you kyra, Lets go play, ha ha.
ah my mother decided that i can't take my road test till i'm passing chem. so i guesse i'm not gonna be getting my lisence as soon as i though i would be, oh well.
Well thats all thats happening in my life!
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(no subject) [Mar. 26th, 2005|04:27 pm]
truebeamer
[mood |contentcontent]

I'm feelin pretty good right about now, My dad took me out driving and told me i ahould sign up for my road test so I think life is about to get better. also My dad told off the bitchonator (my mom) when she started yelling at me for no reason! sweet! unfortunatly I don't get to see Kyra today cause she has "movie night" with the girls tonight, and her family from ireland is over, but I can't wait to see her agian shes fucking amazing. I Love you baby! Tady My dad told me that i can do what ever i want this summer, he said if i want to work i can, if i want to go to the vinyard with them i can, and he said that if i wanna stay home and do nothing i can, damn the choises are good! I really want to apply to work for the town highway dept. though, they pay awsome, and it's not borring work, plus i get to drive around in their trucks, tell me thats not great, I hope i can do it.
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(no subject) [Mar. 24th, 2005|02:37 pm]
truebeamer
Today i went to a funeral witch kinda sucked, but i got to meet kyra's father there so that was good yet some how intimidating, He asked if i was the guy that was taking his daughter to the spackenkill prom, I happily answered yes. Well this snow sucks cause i want summer to be here, oh well
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concert [Mar. 21st, 2005|10:25 pm]
truebeamer
[mood |happyhappy]

ok tonight was the Prisims concert and it went so fucking awsome! I was only on twice but it was still so great. first I went on with the camber orchestra witch was ok but we didn't sound as good as we should have, i don't feel like we were prepared enough to make it sound great though, anyway next i went on with the "electric fiddle group" as it was called, we were kick ass! First the fiddles started all classical like and people thought i was like the rest, and then i came in with the electric bass and then james, lauren, and grant. Every one siad how we were one of the best, and after jazz band, i think we were. I can't wait to play more now. The only thing that could have made this night better would have been if i got to see Kyra. I love you babe!
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fredom [Mar. 18th, 2005|12:39 pm]
truebeamer
[mood |anxiousanxious]

I want to drive sooo bad. why can't i drive? I'm 17 and i have a permit and no license, this bites, any time i want to go anywhere i have to ask if someone will take me cause i'm never allowed to go with my friends when their driving cause my parents don't trust them, or me. plus it isn't even like we don't have the money for a car, we have four cars, and three drivers, hmmmm that mean one more person could be driving. Mybe they think i would go out and get into trouble, well thats just not my thing. All i want is to be able to get into a car and go see my friends when i want to. At this point without a car, it's like I have a short leash on me.aghhhhhhh! Oh well i guesse i'll have to wait.
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(no subject) [Mar. 17th, 2005|11:24 pm]
truebeamer
[mood |aggravatedaggravated]

ok, so this journal thing is real great, you can write all about what on your mind and feel relieved, but what if every thing you want to write about is gonna hurt some one you know is gonna read this? then you feel like an idiot, and not so relived at all, so i guesse i will think about it, and just fel relieved that i got that out there. well greece is lookin like hell right now, we're not doing to bad, but we only have two weeks of practice left and the lead rolls are finding it more imprtant to pay sports and go out to do other activities when they still don't even know the whole play, they don't even know they're lines yet! it pisses me off cause now the whole cast has to suffer and be there from 9-12 at night.
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